Margui Speaks Up

So today began with a weird story: a guy advising me to seek occasional sex, at 8am. It let me deeply shocked - because it seems that, if you push something inside the bottom of a woman, then what is on the top of his head will come out - i.e. she will forget of her obsessive love. It's not like that, I suppose. But instead of laughing I let myself being caught in the trap of obsession and pain and, albeit handling it decently, I could not be free until 12 o'clock. Then I took a bath, had some trickpeas pasta with fresh tomato sauce and get ready for an informational interview with an officer of the UK's Ministry of Finance. Very nice chat, the guy seemed a full-of-humour gangster and nearly offered me a job - I had fun. I also got some watercolor to add colour to my drawings. I felt like liberated, I had wished colours for so long. Art is the best expression of suffering and is therapeutic - this is also why (and for cathartic reasons, too) I went and watched Un Ballo ...

"Dieu, conduis-moi a celui qui je ferai heureux, qui me ferait heureuse." May peace descend as a balm on me, on him, cure our wounds, balm our souls. Bring him happiness and strength, and the pleasure to understand others. Bring me strength, peace and resilience. May I be your living sanctuary, God, be able to pardon and make justice. May my body and my soul be an hymn to beauty and powerful peace. Help me remove pain and fragility, blood and irritation. May my tears be pearls and my hands be swans. Bless him, God, and borrow him your strength and your powerful sight. Pose your hand on your daughter, and let her be your messenger of happiness. Sia fatta la tua volontà, Amen

Eastern people have managed to reduce the problem of scarcity not by creating abundance (sell-side approach), but by reducing the need of materiality (buy-side approach), i.e. minimizing the inanimated projections and tools for their material existence. This is wonderful to an European, as it sounds like the baricentrum of an individual's life has been shofted towards the non-appearing, spiritual life. I was observing this morning my Indian friend, a princess emigrated to the West. I noted the following: Eating habits : she is not constrained by the notion of "portion". She does not care of a packaging, uses to eat like a little mouse, just scraping what she needs in little quantities, and as soon she feels this is sufficient, she stops and stores the rest. She substituted the quantity with the flavour, thus fucking a million-year genetic inclination to store grease and sugar for future famines - which is nowadays the reason for which half of the planet is overweight. ...

I have a virtual friend called as follows: ...just, with another spelling. He used to be the best friend of my boyfriend - then we split up, but they did not. Why am I telling you about that? Well, first because he is a poet. Argh ! A Poet! How can you dare to say that? I suppose that, if you insist in calling yourself a poet, you actually have much better chance to become one (i.e. to be publicly recognized as one, then to believe you actually are one yourself because of that), thank if you don't. This guy happily writes and does anything with paper, colors and fiber, and pots, including keeping a cultivated garden (I mean -plotted - not a garden of poets of course!) and cooking whatever they grow in America. This guy has probably a soft heart and some sensibility, a very high opinion of himself nor he is immune from the playful, naive attitude which is the greatest asset of Americans vis -à- vis average Europeans, and their major pitfall if they compare with the best among ...

Here's my friend Aurora Dalma statment "...What can I write? I love going to salsa classes, you forget about everything else in your life, all the little troubles, the stress from work, all you see is the teacher and the steps, all you hear is the music, all you feel is joy...every time I step out from my salsa class, I feel like I can take on the world, I smile for no reason on the street and I don't care if people see me. And thanks to this, I realise that life is worth living, because no matter how many problems there are in your life, there are always things you can do to make yourself happy, without depending on the others...like taking salsa classes!" May God bless her. Somethig senseful to say? Ask me to be hosted! If you subscribe to this blog, and your little face appears on the right hand side of this page, you will be entitled to author a post on this blog. Think about it!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love As an abstract concept, love usually refers to a deep, ineffable feeling of tenderly caring for another person. I left today a person that I cherished, for which I felt something, and which I felt, felt something for me. But. This person is not free. I read about two lovers who are re-joining again in America after one year of separation. But. I have nothing like that. I have a person who just do not care. I feel ready for loving and being loved, but I am here, alone. I am frustrated about that. This is gloomy. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love Love is any of a number of emotions and experiences related to a sense of strong affection [1] and attachment . The word love can refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from generic pleasure ("I loved that meal") to intense interpersonal attraction ("I love my boyfriend").

Hi everybody, here is a list of tools I use for combating depression from unemployment. A swimming pool season ticket, the most useful thing you can bring with you when you wake up "What colour is your parachute?" a book by Mr Bolle on how to find your dram job, if any. "Mental Training", a book my prof. Tupperware, the inventor of plastic cans, on how to suppress thinkings which tend to bog us down alcohol and friends ...any other suggestion? This database will be updated on a regular basis.

Here a picture of the first days being unemployed. The issue is whether this time has to be spent in the effort to grab a new temporary job, whatever it may be, or needs to be taken as an opportunity to rethink my mission in life. My answer is: the second you said. These past days have actually begun very well, and full of human touches. I went out with a friend for a beer and, having realized that I was desperately unemployed and she seemed much stronger than I was, when she asked: "so, what is your battle plan?", I quietly talked a bit a then left. Then, on the train home, I started to feel dizzy and wishing to vomit. I rushed out and kneeled on the trottoir. I was with my head declined, my mouth open and rivers of saliva going down to the floor. I was waiting for the acid-sour vomit to occupy all my aesophagus and rush out irresistible like a volcano. I was there quietly waiting as a sheep in the slaughterhouse. Then, a person gave me a napkin and asked me if I w...

Wow! Ma quello è amico di Adriano Sofri! "Oooh, but...this guy is friend with Adriano Sofri "- a smart friend of mine told me, full of admiration. This conversation happened because we saw that the former Italian politician had commented on that guy's status on facebook. The two of us were suspicious. Shall he be a jurk, using the name of the famous Italian former politician? Therefore, I tried the scientific method and directly asked frienship to Sofri. Well, you do not have to be an intellectual to do it, you just tell him you want, and ....pluf, you are his friends! So...if that is qualifying, this is a zero-cost way to qualify yourself as "Oooh, this guy is Sofri's friend, God, what an intellectual!" 1. go on http://www.facebook.com/ 2. follow the instructions to create an account 3. go to http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=74463513793&ref=mf#/profile.php?id=1106117945&ref=ts 4. ask frienship 5. wait 30 minu...

Nojob. Unemployed. Hi, here I am. And I am not the only one But, unlike them, I am alone. So I resoluted to take this as a chance to think over my adventurous life, with the aim to try to make it even more adventurous, and to seed the seeds of success. I have thanked my emplyers for what they could give me, I have bought myself a cheap but nice printer, named Clara, super-efficient and still smelly of plastic and petroleum just as babies smell like an internal organ when they see light for the first time. I resoluted to give myself a routine during the future days I will be home alone looking for myself, and some exterior targets, so not to lose sight of the time, and not to lose my mind. This is the same psychologist recommended for the victims of Abruzzo's heartquake in Italy I decided that: I will go to swim every day at 8am I will lose 5 kilos, together with a friend (but still, 5 kilos each!), by the 10th of July I will keep track of my experience on this blog, once ...

I have watched today Gaetano Donizetti's Lucia di Lammermoor at the Opera house La Monnaie in Brussels. I cried like a child, also because I had a person in mind, I hold an unhappy love for someone, therefore I am very sensitive to this kind of topics. Even if the difference is that Lucia's love is corresponded but oppsed by her brother, whereas my love is not corresponded. Whatever. Lucia is the sister of a Scottish noble, who wants to marry her to a perspective political ally; but she loves Edgardo, and before he must temporarily leave for France, they promise fidelity one to the other. Letters of Edgardo are destroied by Lucia's brother, and a false letter, which states that Edgardo has married another woman, is also fabricated, to inuce Lucia to renegate her love and marry the politician. She so does. But before being possessed by this man, having seed Edgardo abruptly arrive at the wedding, she kills her husbard and becomes folly, then she kills herself. Edgardo see...

This is the next thing I am gonna tackle as soon as I can. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQUkkTcrgvs I heard Radu Lupu perform it in a lunar , liquid way, such as the bird was in fact a jelly fish. They say that Aldo Ciccolini is extremely good at playing that, making it look like a "colibri", a hysteric, brainless bird , as a prophet bird like the phoenix is supposed to be. I would like to let it emerge that the second part actually is the bird's prophecy of prosperity, and let the two side-parts be mysterious, nasty and smoky as they deserve to be. In the first and last part is just an unintelligen and witched bird - and the God is not yet/no more speaking through it. This is a typical "easy" piece that it is extremely easy to play with arrogance and impotence. I find the end spectacular - extremely difficult . Good luck! Un petit cadeau schumannien pour toi, mon lecteur! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XIshPW0mKM4&feature=related M

OK, so, a friend of mine suggested the following strategy to meet potential partners. I like it because it takes a scientific approach. It nothing more, nothing less than an algorythm . Go in a right pub, at a right hour, where the definition of right pub is a pub where you have lots of people of your target age at the right hour is the hour where there is a peak of crowd - not too early, not too late. Take two drinks, or the amount of alcohol which makes your defences and your social shame lower, without letting you drunk. You know that limit. I know that limit - [censored for secuirity reasons]. Be sure to take 3 girl-friends woth you, if you are a girl, or one boy-friend with you, if you are a boy. If you are a girl [boy's part is the complementary, and easily deductable], look around, and perceive who is looking at you. If you like him/her, proceed to the so-called eye-fucking phase , where you sustain the sight. If you do not like him/her, just put you sight away. I would nev...

Manga. Mi manga: un po' di festa, un po' di intimità. Tuttavia, quando stava per essermi data la possibilità to satisfy my needs, here it comes - the manga called DeathNote. A friend made reference to it over a chat: I have had sporadic episodes of you-tube addiction in the past, in a period in which I felt lonely and out of place and I used to watch and watch little sketches and comedies at youtube (Monthy Python, the Italian Luciana Littizzetto in Chetempochefa , Paolino Ruffini from Livorno) until 1am to turn my brain off - but not much more. I hate computers. To keep it short, I watched 14 episodes of this stuff in a row, for a total of 5 hours withoit drinking or moving from my chair. It was terrible. Note that each episode last more or less 20 min and I had to confirm my interest in the manga-cartoon every half-episode, by clicking on the relevant YouTube link. And it's not finished. Yesterday, Friday 20th, I still sat down albeit very sleepy and watched the follow...

I have read Les enfants terribles by Jean Cocteau , in French, and just finished it. It is a terrible, horrible, symbolistic, heavily poetic book. It makes the reader full of disgust and macabre understanding at the end. It has an explicit trait of The great Gatsby (a death on a sport-car) and of Madame Bovary (poison at the end! To exit a difficult narrative situation). It evocates very poetic images: the "boules de neiges qui etoilaient le mur", tears which slip into retracted lips, and come out again, as new tears from the mouth. Cocteau is able to describe the walk of this girl as "heavy, light, flying" and to give you the impression that you are really understanding what that means. . Les enfants terribles is the right, insightful title. These are the terrible children you see (or you have been) who torture animals. The "vierge sacrée", the protagonist, the "genie-de-la-chambre"-priestess Elisabeth tourtures and dominates all her peers,...

[This is a so-called "thinkpiece" requested by a recruiter - I wrote it in 12 min. more or less] "Is the nation’s interest in celebrity an enjoyable distraction from everyday life or an unhealthy obsession?" Celebrities are to be admired, followed and cherished by the so-called “ordinary people”. This is what the word “celebrity” means: “well-known”. Therefore, we might accept as unavoidable the fact that people are interested in stars, be they actors, politicians, or singers. However, how far this interest goes and which aspects of stars’ life it covers, is a very important issue to consider. I think that the best way to approach the problem of people’s strong interest in celebrity is to assess the effect of it and to work backwards. First, we need to consider that celebrities are regarded as models of behaviour. This is because a “VIP” is supposed to be happy in life, and all people want from life is usually to achieve happiness. Therefore, emulating the...

Global widespread panic The God had heard your say The storm came on the way The dance of clouds was manic The forest became darker Worms came out to the rain And well before the pain You heard the crack of thunder «Farewell! Farewell!» You’d told her «I shan’t see you any more» She fainted on the floor, No reason to live further «Farewell!» She was your love «Farewell!» She had been yours The forest and the God Had lost one of their doves She is dead – her pain is yours now Whenever there’ll be rain You’ll hear her crying whisper Which will drive you insane

When you are about having sex, you shall protect your body and you MUST protect your spirit. I n my view, the physical act in itself may not particularly incisive, as it contains something phisiological which reduces it to a tender, endearing, sef-caring activity. I once experienced that, and the act passed through my mind innocently and rapidly. I heard someone saying that a man in its twenties shall have sex with the woman he dates, because it is somehow "natural". However, sex acquires a superior human meaning when human brain is involved. A friend of mine, a chemist, insists on saying that the particular conformation of female brain makes women less emotionally resilient and this is why they e.g. suffer more from breakups. Well, I think this is bullshit. But I know what obsession is. I have lived my life having my boyfriends as my best friends ever, because the compassion and solidarity could pass through the words and through the hands at the same time. Therefore, I ha...

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